It’s weird without car now, I forget how to travel by bus and train. After 3 days, I got lost finding my way to work yesterday. Yeah, I had to work half day (got scolded by my bos), so, I send the car to the workshop and picked it up after work to return back.

My dad has been very very quiet lately and I feel very bad.

The weekend was not that bad actually, I spent the whole time (almost) driving around and going to places I’ve never been (those not accessible without own transportation). Unfortunately, I can’t upload the pictures to blogspot.

I’ll be fine, it will take a lil more time to get over some things.

I’m falling apart.

Labels: Dreams, driving, lost, Love

1. I just had a minor accident.
Thanks to my dad, I spent $1k on all the damages.
That goes my hard earned money. Heart pain.
I had to take urgent leave on Monday for the repair.
All my plans ruined.

2. I’ve been having bad feelings. I hate this.
Today, I shouldn’t have let my dad drive.

3. I might need to be quarantine, if I were to go KL next week (which I’ve already planned).
That means, I need to take my 7 days of my own leave.
What a waste and I already spent the money on the damage.

4. I have this sudden urge to adopt a rabbit
My friend found a brown cute chubby rabbit.
It needs someone to look after for at least a month before it found a permanent adopter.
I really want it. For now, that’s what makes me happy and smile.

I can’t really smile. I’m freaking tired, been driving all around and less sleep. The accident really makes me feel heart pain. But, I’m looking on a bright side, at least no one get injured. I always tell myself, money can find but life can never be replace. I still mad at my dad, but it’s ok.

Everything happened for a reason. Some things might not go by plan but I believe God has better plan for us.

Tomorrow will be a better day. InsyaAllah…

Labels: driving, unlucky

I never feel so heart pain like this before.

My Ots, my hard earned money, my time, my effort----almost all gone cause of one @$^#%% mistake.

Thanks so much to my dad.

Labels: hurt

Labels: memory, wishes

I’ve been so exhausted from the OT.
Weekends don’t seem good too.
I’m awaken, and everything seems so wrong.
Life’s not that pretty, behind it all, I’m blinded by all the bullshit.
How could that happen?
Now, I hate you the most.

Labels: Love

Sometimes I feel hurt. I’m unsure, all I think of is the negativities of my surrounding and that’s the reason I don’t trust. But yet, I easily fall for words. I don’t know where’s the ending and the outcome. I’m left uncertain, I let myself down too many times, and now, I’ll never trust again.

one more kiss could be the best thing
one more lie could be the worst
and all these thoughts are never resting
and you're not something i deserve

in my head there's only you now
this world falls on me
in this world, there's real and make believe
this seems real to me
you love me, but you dont know who i am
i'm torn between this life i lead
and where i stand

you love me, but you don't know who i am
so let me go
let me go

i dream we head to what i hope for
and i turn my back on loving you
how could this love be a good thing
when i know what i'm going through

i'm torn between this life i lead
and where i stand
you love me, but you dont know who i am
so let me go, just let me go
no matter how hard i try
i cant escape these things inside
i know, i know
but all the pieces fall apart
you will be the only one who knows
who knows
***
It’s only 14 June! I’ve overspent yet I haven’t feel satisfied. I kept on thinking but I can’t make any decision.

Labels: shopping

Exhaust.

I don’t think you’ll ever understand, cause it’s not easy as it seems to be.

I meant what I said.

Labels: Emotions

I used to hate my forehead hairline, the ‘M’ shape but I get nice comments about it too. Today, my beautician told me, I have nice hairline and I must be an ambitious person. It set me thinking.

It takes only 1 mistake to ruin a life, to shatter all the dreams.

Labels: Dreams

Well, what’s new?

I’ve been having Overtimes and all I ever think of is making a lot of money!
Weekend had been better, especially with the GSS. It makes me anxious to see all the great deals but it hurts so much to spend my hard earned money away.

Sometimes, I don’t know why I need to save so much when in the end, money is not everything afterall, I guess, I wanted that sense of security, so someday I won’t make the same mistakes.

If you ever notice, I updated my wishlist – Lasik Operation. Yeah, I’m sick and tired of being blind without my lenses!

I feel the need to drive.

Fuck, no bonus this year!

Labels: wishes