There are a lot of events had happened. Whatever it is, I’m glad and grateful to be alive, I feel much more lively than before. Well, first of all, SIP had ended. No more waking up in the morning, rushing for work. No more boring day, staring at the desktop and look out to the bright blue sea and sky wishing and dreaming away. I feel like my burdens are lighten, and it feels like a brand new days for me. It’s time to stop dreaming and make the dream come true! SIP report and logbook are handed in.:D I went back school for a few days now, and I feel like screaming. I miss school so much!!! It’s so wonderful to be in school though it feels abit odd not to go work in the morning.

By the day, it has been enjoyable days for me, a lot of food to eat. Like now, I feel so full, I just had nasi goring kampong, crayfish!! And chendol at Simpang bedok! I’m going fat!!!

I’m left with 14 days before I can say goodbye to school. I’ve finished my MP project but feel very insecure with it. Tomorrow, I will finish up my poster and logbook. Anyway, anyone interested in going for holiday? Bangkok or Bali??



BTW......
Happy belated Birthday Ahmed Tiger Doll!!! This post is specially for you, I owe u this....


"When I first saw you in the MOE class, I was saying in my mind,’ Slenggerrrnyeee, haizz, class ni mesti boring!” hehehe. You looked like Chinese mix blood guy and with that specs you used to wear, it makes you look so nerdy! I guess I was right about you being mix Chinese blood but I discovered more than that afterwards and my life changed. It was coincident that we were in the same project group. The first meeting at the void deck really changed my impression about you. You are full of ideas, very ambitious and crappy too! Hehe. Remember we had to think of an idea for our business plan? And you were so confident saying,’ I know! We conquer the oxygen and then we make people buy for the oxygen!’’ You are so funny buntal, but I really admire your thinking, honesty, opinion, confidence and sometimes your ego.

The hours of meeting for the stupid project really built our friendship. The walks to the safra bustop in the evening, I really enjoy listening to you, it opens up my mind sometimes. Somehow, I know I can trust you as a friend and share anything with you. You are a good listener though sometimes, your opinions are weird or against mine. You are different, in a good way and bad way at the same time.

Like I’ve said, you are really different in many ways from other people I’ve known. I’ve never met anyone so proud of his race before.hahaha. You are so ‘semangat arab’. Well, it doesn’t bother me that much, but I think you are too obsess. Your obsession really remind me of my nephew who happens to look like you when you were young. Hahaha, it’s so funny when I see Zikri and then think of you being a baby.

Anyway, You are also irritating at times, you like to tease and bully me over and over again. I remember that night at the chalet with nad, Gosh, you were so irritating and remember the blue black arm? Shhh…hehehe….I’ll never forget that, I was really pissed off, that why I didn’t turn to you when I drop off the bus. Hehehe….:P

And you are weird too!!! How can anyone don’t like fried baby squid with sweet and sour source??!!! I just love the look on your face when you had to see me eat the fried squid head with chilli source from Old Chang Khee!! Hehehe….Not only that, I love to see you on the bed, when the nurse poke the huge needle to your vein to draw blood. Hahahhahaha…You don’t even dare to see the needle poke through you. .Then after that blood donation, you were like,’ you…….I pening lar…..I macam nak pengsan..’ hahaha. A guy who likes to show his ‘not so muscular body’ is afterall a scareddy cat. Hahaha. It is very brave of you to follow me donate blood, I hope you are not forced. haha

You are so sweet too. You are always the first to wish me happy birthday since 3 years ago I've know you. I remember you attempt to draw a potrait of me for my birthday. hahaha. It was so nice of u to draw but when I saw the potrait, I was thinking, 'Am i that ugly?" hahahaha...It was scary too and i'm glad u didn't give me that coz if u did, I will always think I'm ugly and scary.hehehe.



I appreciate everything you’ve given me. To me, you are a best friend who I will always cherish and be there for. Maybe you don’t realize this, but you’ve taught me to be stronger than what I’ve become and to stand for myself.

You are always remembered and missed. Take good care of yourself, especially on the road. Open your eyes big and concentrate. ! Be careful of the words you gonna say, think of the consequences that you may get, however, speak your mind when you think you are right, you’ll be respected. I’ll pray that God will always bless you with happiness and health. Happy 20th Birthday, I hope you like this testimonial I wrote for you!"

20th birthday will be one of the memorable day, for some reasons. I don't know if I should be happy or sad but all I know, I can't help but broke down, crying my heart out. No one understand my feelings. Thanks for the wishes.



Well I was there on the day
They sold the cause for the queen,
And when the lights all went out
We watched our lives on the screen.
I hate the ending myself,
But it started with an alright scene.
It was the roar of the crowd
That gave me heartache to sing.
It was a lie when they smiled
And said, "you won't feel a thing"
And as we ran from the cops
We laughed so hard it would sting

If I'm so wrong (so wrong, so wrong)
How can you listen all night long?
(night long, night long)
Now will it matter after I'm gone?
Because you never learned a goshdarn thing.

You're just a sad song with nothing to say
About a life long wait for a hospital stay
Well if you think that I'm wrong,
This never meant nothing to you

I spent my high school career
Spit on and shoved to agree
So I can watch all my heroes
Sell a car on tv
Bring out the old guillotine
We'll show 'em what we all mean.

So go away, just go, run away.
But where did you run to?
And where did you hide?
Go find another way,
price you pay
where oh ,where oh ,where oh,where oh ,where oh ,where oh

It's just a sad song with nothing to say
About a life long wait for a hospital stay
And if you think that I'm wrong,
This never meant nothing to you, come on
You're just a sad song with nothing to say
About a life long wait for a hospital stay
Well if you think that I'm wrong,
This never meant nothing to you
At all, at all, at all , at all..

Today, I attended a wedding ceremony. It was so beautiful, i mean their wedding theme and setting, black and pink with red roses everywhere. the food was great too.. So outstanding, but lucky they never copy my wedding idea, black and red, with a touch of goth. I get to meet Zikri too, and he is simply cutee.....

just thinking and came out with nothing at all. I'm lost. I'm not sure of myself, or maybe, I'm thinking of my parents who might get affected over my decision. Am I selfish? As much as I want to help them, I don't want to lose out also. Can I manage both, can I choose both? Sometimes, I just feel like crying, keep asking God, why He let go of the people who had 'used' us and left us like this? But I keep telling myself, there is a reason for everything, blessing in disguise.

Today was the absolute wonderful day for me, though it started very bad. But I guess life is more than that, even if i had to fail and try again. I feel like I live a meaningful life today for once in my life, I went to my used to be 'hang out' places which bring back those vibrant memories. It's been so long and my life has been work, project and school since then. It was such a nice break from stress. Well, I went to marina square, watch '27 dresses' and had lunch at Secret Recipe then stroll down to esplanade while enjoying the view from roof top, after which to east coast beach! It was such a relief to breathe in the air, hear the sound of the wave again. I feel so alive, :) I'm just so happy today.

Anyway, currently, I'm so obsess over the movie 'Taxi', the french movie. Gosh, I simple love the car race, and the humor.hahhaha.

Just a lil update about work, I've one more week. That's gonna be very fast, and I can't wait because they don't seem to have any work for me. So, I'll just stay in the compactor room, stare at the beautiful beach, or at the cute rabbit on my wallpaper till it's time to go home. Well, actually, it wasn't that bad. The only reason I still come to work is 3 guys who always make me smile and laugh in the office. First is the pakcik, who like to come and try to scare me, then talk to me. I love to talk to him, so funny and sometimes, we discuss over things. Second, is the cutest guy in the office. He is so cute but married, yet he's so friendly. What I like about him is his chinese accent, so cina ching chong and whenever he talks to me, i try not to laugh. hahaha. Lastly, is this IT guy who always help me whenever i have problems with my pc, and he like to mumble to himself. he is monotonous too, and he always make me confuse and then laugh because I don't get what he's saying. haha....

Enough of enjoyment, I gotta to start working hard from tomorow. I just gotta finish that a lil bit of shit for my project. Just another 3 more weeks, then I'll get all the freedom in the world!

This picture is my wallpaper and it never fail to make me smile. I can just stare at it, and feel so happy. hope it make u happy too!





Disaat cinta tercipta
Semestinya ku merasa
Dikala hasrat mendalam
Semestinya ku berbalas?
Dari hati kini kusadari
Tak semestinya kuberkasih
Jika hati tak dapat berbagi
Baiknya rasa itu tersimpan dalam
Semestinya aku mencinta
Seharusnya aku menyayang
Oh maafkan jika semua ini yang kuberikan
Untukmu
Dari hati kini kusadari
Tak semestinya kuberkasih
Jika hati tak dapat berbagi
Baiknya rasa itu tersimpan dalam
Dari hati kini kusadari
Tak semestinya kuberkasih

It is weird how you go from being strangers to being friends to being more than friends to being practically strangers again and it all happens so fast.


There are so many things happen since the past few days, and at the same time, I'm still bored at work doing nothing but to re-edit and re-write my reports over and over again. I'm 90% done but 10 % seems lost somewhere I can't figure it out. With that much time, amazingingly, I manage to study my FTT the whole book today.


Anyway, I miss the sun, I miss the breeze on the beach, the sound of the water smashing on the rocks, blow bubbles, feel free, just be happy. I feel a lil trapped right now, but I'll shall wait for 1 more month when poly life is finally over.


Well, I donno why these days I'm a lil emotional over things or maybe people are just being insensitive towards me. Sometimes, it feels like being against me. I hate it when People thinks that they know me very well, but the fact is, i'm not what he/she tinks. by the way,I'm left with just few days. I'm not prepared and i'm afraid. i wish i didnt have to know.


I need a life...meaningful life...

I spent the new year doing my project reports, watch tv and feeling extremely pissed with my noisy drunken bustard neighbour the whole day. It would be a day I remember though, calling the police, just to tell me that they will monitor the situation only when there is other complaints! I almost lost my patience, but well, I don't want to start my new year feeling angry.
Neither do I feel happy actually. This year wasn't ended on a high note, but I feel blessed to step into a whole new 2008. It had not been a fabulous year but I've gained a lot of experiences that I will never forget. Life is not always bed of roses but I hope I get to achieve what I want this year.

2007 was a year I discover more about myself. I see my weaknesses and how much I had grown and still growing. At the same time, I finally open up my mind and eyes, realise who aren't true. It's sad that I had lose my trust in alot of people and mostly, on myself. It's sad to lose some people who I thought was real. Nevertheless, I'm glad that I still have that few gems who always there for me.

I'm begining to be more honest with myself and others though it might be hard. Truth is ugly. I will speak my mind up if I have to. Be less selfish. Talk less, and achieve more.